Hey,

Finally made a start on my year book entry. It doesn't help that I have to keep deleting and rewritting things because I am aware that it will be read by a lot of people, and therefore I have to avoid controversy and really surreal comments. A bit like I avoid talking to homosexuals and their petting zoos.

I got another letter from the BMW garage reminding me that my car - my BMW 318T - is due a service. This came as a bit of a surprise because I could have swore it had gone in pretty recently but on second thoughts I realised it probably was that time of year again dear me doesn't time fly oh wait look I don't have a fucking BMW. I really want to know how this mistake has been made in the first place. I imagine the real owner of the car - registration N258 BNW - must be sitting at home going out of his mind wondering why his loyal trustworthy BMW garage is no longer reminding him that his car is due a service. Every time the phone rings he probably jumps up in the hope of hearing those magic words: "Our records indicate that your car will shortly be due its next routine check up". But, alas, all he gets is the usual: "Our records indicate that your windows will be shortly be due to be stolen. If you get the front and back windows replaced now, we'll do the top and bottom ones for free!".

So I decided to call up the garage and ask them what exactly they had done with my car. The work experience boy I spoke to first claimed that he hadn't got it, but when pushed did admit to having got my windows. The sales assistant said he remember seeing it earlier, that it was probably on his desk, which needed a good tidying. I eventually got through to the garage manager, who assured me it couldn't have gotten far. I was just starting to argue that if it didn't turn up by Wednesday I would need either a replacement or some gift voucher of the corresponding approximate value when he asked when I had brought my car in. When I told him I had never brought my car in, he seemed to be insisting that it's loss was no longer his fault. He also seemed very unexcited about the ideas of collective responsibility. He said that he lost his wife last year and he didn't expect everyone to help get her back. I said he could have her back if he wanted. This seemed to bring the conversation to a close.

I ended up sending him some vouchers of the corresponding approximate value.

Speak soon,

Craig