Walking along Magdelan Street last night, two couples collided when one couple walked across the other. The affronted couple, so outraged by this, stopped where they were and did that things couples do when they look like they are talking privately, but loud enough so that the first couple knew exactly that they were being talked about.

Ironically, as they stopped, I had to swerve at the last second just to avoid them. And did they notice that they had just done to someone else exactly what that had stopped to complain about? No. So, I did that thing that people walking on their own do when they look like they are talking to themselves, but do it loud enough so that the second couple knew exactly that I was mad.

I think we can learn many things from this. Firstly, human beings become outraged easily, by stupid things, and believe that they would never do the same. Secondly, always go out in packs of two.

Also, two fourteen year old girls in a Vauxhall Astra love me. Does anyone have their number?